There's a Reason They Used to Call it Vanity Press!

This is me drawing a hugh sigh of relief and announcing the imminent launch of “Under the Bus.”
 
If you’re thinking “OMG! She actually did it!” you are probably one of the couple of dozen people for whom I wrote this novel. For you guys, I note that it's available worldwide in paperback from Amazon and wherever fine self-published books are sold online (priced higher than I would have liked, but it's a whopper and that jacked up the minimum that would enable a printed edition to be available beyond Amazon) and, far more reasonably, electronically via Kindle (other e-book flavors will probably follow in a few months time). As per the usual drill, status on this will be posted on my Facebook fan page and links added to the book’s page on my website.
 
If you're NOT one of the OMGers, just give me a  big “Yay!” for the achievement, and leave it at that. Seriously! The release of “Under the Bus” puts me 75% through my 4-books-come-hell-or-high-water project, a milestone I embrace with unequivocal pride and joy.  And the 4^th novel, “Chasing Fireflies” (some of you think of this as 'the theater one’), should be available within the next 14 months. All in all, a big Wahoo! But this novel, "Under the Bus”, might be something of a “huh?”
 
Let me explain. 
 
If you follow my fan page, you may have noticed the quote I posted last month:"I don't know whether it's art or not, and I don't care. What I wanted was to show the energy and rush and confusion of American life." This was Thomas Hart Benton, talking about his 1931 mural "America Today." Except for the "rush" part (and the fact that it refers to a completely successful work of art!), it perfect captures my feelings about “Under the Bus.” 

Like Benton, we're living in a transitional society with tons of new or disappearing experiences to capture. I chose to focus this book on what I know best: the experience of the over-educated and under-employed trying to get a grip on post-industrial, post-middle-class America. Good times! No surprise, I had a surplus of material. Then there was the bigger challenge of how to frame it. 

What many people will say I "should have" done is push out a hilarious broad-stroke satire, or else craft some kind of passionate romance and/or murder to slap in the forefront of the novel and push my primary subject into the background. Instead -- and this is the Janus-headed blessing/curse of self-publishing -- I opted to follow my heart. Let's just say my heart is overly ambitious!  The resulting novel, while speckled with some very nice bits, is an overblown collage that might not be particularly compelling to anyone who's not one of the previously-referenced OMG-ers. For others reading this post, even if you're super-supportive of my writing, it might be wise to sit this one out and wait for my next novel. Again, I am completely serious about this.
 
Anyway, so you have a better idea of what I'm talking about, you can click here for a sneak peek at "Under the Bus" (which is probably the most entertaining part of the book).

And here's the blurb:

Waking up from the American Dream—one re-org at a time . Welcome to Pinnacle Management Services. The fastest growing managed office services company in North America. Blessed with good timing and a staff of over-burdened under-paid misfits and broken toys, PMS is the paradigm of turn-of-millennium business success. From the initial growth spurt that boosted PMS from the ranks of a simple mom-&-pop shop, it’s a fast five years to the equity partnership investment that surely foreshadows an eventual public offering. 

As CEO Kippy Melcher would tell you, he’s never made a bad decision…only sometimes he doesn’t get the results he wants. When that happens, someone has to take responsibility. And whenever that happens, well, someone else is certain to be thrown under the bus. 

Reading “Under the Bus” is like meeting a friend for Happy Hour and hearing how her job is worse than yours.

 

One Post to Update Them All

If you follow me here–or anywhere–you’ll have noticed that, despite having all the usual channels, I don’t post much at the best of times. When you’re a slow writer, like me, there just isn’t time. It’s tough enough to juggle novel-writing and making a living with maintaining contact with the humans I love. Over the last year, having been not-so-gently nudged from salaried employment to contract work, I’ve been scrambling more furiously than ever.

 And now, I’m heading into NaNo. The book I’d been working on has run over by about five months and is still 2 chapters shy of a complete draft (and several hundred hours shy of a final one). And even so, I’m heading into NaNo. That probably sounds counterproductive to you. Unless you’ve experienced NaNo the same way that I have. As I blogged back in 2011, "NaNo is not to be missed.” It seems somewhat ironic (in the classic, not the millennial, use of the word) that the “jolly little workplace comedy” I was kicking off that year is the same bear that I’ve been fighting to finish off (it turned out to be neither so jolly nor so little after all).

This will be my fifth consecutive November writing marathon. I look forward to it with a mixture of excitement and dread. I expect a particularly difficult run this year, a combination of escalated time pressures and a project that is fraught with emotional baggage. The book I’ll be working on, Chasing Fireflies, is something I’ve been waiting my entire adult life to write. Waiting and preparing. In my mind, the novels I’ve written before–whether completed or not–have been training to write this one. Am I finally ready? No matter how much you prepare, you never feel as ready as you’d like to be. Even if I am ready–enough–is NaNo the right engine to kick it off? NaNo is relentless; it’s brilliant at pushing me forward by not allowing me the luxury of deliberating over every word. But for this novel, I want to deliberate; I want to write with the beauty and fluidity of a much better writer than I am. I know (and yes, I understand it’s probably a self-fulfilling prophecy) that if I manage to push through and “win” another NaNo, I’ll end up with mostly dross.

And yet, I’m doing NaNo. Because the focus and the confidence it gives me are a gift to be treasured. I write nearly every day of the year, but it’s the month of November, National Novel Writing Month, when I feel most like A Writer. On the other hand…don’t expect to read any of my work anytime soon!

Kindle Markdown Event: The Breast of Everything

My version of a post-Holiday sale! 

Whether you're breaking in a new device or just wanting to make the most of that pre-New Year's slump with a cool read, please note that starting on December 26, with a one-day-only bargain basement price of 99 cents, I will be running a special markdown promotion on the Kindle edition of The Breast of Everything on Amazon. 

I know, I know!  What says post-Christmas better than a book about a talking breast that might be...um...Let's just say She is that She is. Maybe you've been curious, but didn't want to risk the regular price on something that sounded so odd. Maybe you've read the book and liked it, but were leery of recommending it to a friend. Here's your chance to buy or spread the word! 

Those who miss Day 1 will still have two days to practically steal a copy for only 1.99!  That's right: less than the cost of a ride on the NYC subway--and surely equally entertaining! Starting December 29, the price starts inching up: first to 2.99, then 3.99 (12/30) and 4.99 (12/31), before returning to the regular low price of 5.99 on January 1. Shop early for the best price!

Mark your calendar and be sure to share widely! 

Sneak peak at The Upsilon Knot!

Ready for a sneak peak of The Upsilon Knot?  There's a prezzie for you, waiting at the dedicated website!

Happy Birthday, Nikola Tesla!

Nikola Tesla

Today is the anniversary of Nikola Tesla's birth. 

Like any number of writers with a steampunk or Victorian historic fantasy to tell, I've highjacked poor Mr. Tesla as a character. Specifically, Tesla appears in my forthcoming novel, The Upsilon Knot, as the first love of heroine Claude Monteith.

In honor of his birthday, here's Claude's girlhood memory of the object of her affection:

"She'd been half-past fifteen when Father had brought him home, and she'd never dreamed of a man like Nikola Tesla. He was handsome, like someone's idea of a poet, with a white face, tumbled curls and those dark haunted eyes. But he wasn't a poet or a painter. Nor was he on any of the boring paths followed by the young men of whom her aunt approved. He was a scientist and, after Father, the most intelligent man she'd ever met. He was someone who should have appreciated her. Even though she'd been younger than her age in certain ways, he should have been able to see her potential; but, for a man of science, Mr. Tesla had been oddly conservative about women and frustratingly blind."

Probably my favorite Mam-ism

Autumn

For those who may have missed an entry or two, here are the collected tweets of Adeline Thorne, Oxford Scholar and Titanic Passenger.  Addie’s was the final in a series of three stories told as tweets-from-history.  This project was a sub-set of my three-month Extreme Writing self-challenge.  To see what I have to say about this experience, visit Light Up the Cave

*Caught Roper wearing the most appalling painted stockings. Sets back the cause of women's degrees 20 years!

*More 2 do than hours of the day. What does it say about me as a scholar that I'd rather be reading Zuleika Dobson?

*Slept 5 hrs of last 48, & not sequentially. Living on stewed tea. Hair a greasy mop. Ah, the joy of education!

* Sat my final exam 2day.  My FINAL final exam.  Not certain of results but still more nerves about America than any exam.

* 2 busy 2 think & just as well.  Big trunk packed & taken away, also three boxes of books.  Next I see them, we will all be in New York.

* Walking from the High, saying goodbye 2 trees & stone walls.  Why does everything ordinary seem so precious when you’re leaving it behind?

*No idea how women dress in New York.  Do I need a new hat? Or do I just want that one with the velvet pansies?

*2 cold 2 punt but didn't care! Must whilst I can. Don't think they have punts in America.  What do they do at those Universities? :)

*2day, last time typing petitions for WSPU.  2nite will b cocoa party in Maude's room.  Final cocoa party.  Everything today so final!

*Vi Roper is engaged! 2 the Paper Baronet of all things! We all laughed, but she is so happy. I won't b here for wedding. It all sinks in.

* Kind lttr fr cousin Simon.  I will be met at dock & shown city. Asks if I wld like 2 see The Pigeon. Missed it @ Royalty. World so small!

*Salve Oxford.  Salve St. Hilda’s.  Piece of my heart left behind.  Wld I b this sad were I staying in England? Father wld have known 

*Oh, London! Must memorize every corner with my heart!  So grateful 2 Maude & the W's 4 having me 2 stay these final weeks.

*Met Maude’s brother Desmond, back from Germany. Very kind & well spoken, as she always said.  Beautiful eyes & such shoulders!

 * All day signing papers w Mr Martens. Father's box rcvd from safekeeping, too. Have rcvd tkt from his hands. No going back now

*Rainy day looking through box.  Father’s watch; their letters & dear faces. Hope Mother’s Limoges arrived safely. All that is left of home

*Tea with Roper.  Aglow & all talk about wedding. Wants me 2 come back 4 it.  Can’t bear 2 admit I will be 2 skint. Made polite noises. 

* Something about voyage makes me want 2 shop. Silliness!  They do have stores in NY.  Still taking no chances w boots!  Bought both pair. 

* Jermyn St 4 gift for Cuz Si. Also Mr. & Mrs. W 4 their kindness.  Des such a help.  Must ask Maude what he likes. Lovely noil scarf 4 her.

* Maude envisions shipboard romance.  Doubtful.  Remember crossing 2 France? Shall likely b green the entire way.

* Much buoyed. Ran into Em et al. Boston cousin took degree @ Vassar! Said fine things & is giving me lttrs of intro 2 friends nearby.  

* Des cinema-crazy. The Sunbeam – charming in a way, but foolish.  Sez Mr Griffith a force 2 b reckoned w. Wants 2 come 2 NY to work w him

* Exceptionally fine day. Will not b here for Easter so debuted new blue hat with ribbon bow & aigrette. Everyone says is quite fetching.

* Maude & Des insist on accompanying me 2 Southampton. Am weak enuff 2 accept. Will b that much harder in end, but want 2 hold every minute 

* Tea w Jonesy & little Kate.  Browsing new books @ WH Smith.  Like always. Hard 2 believe am not going back up 4 Trinity, but getting excited

* Restless. Must have walked 5 miles 2day.  Said all goodbyes. Already feel as if gone. Am ready now for an adventure!

* How to pack 4 ocean crossing? Only small case in cabin. Trunk will go below. Shld not have shopped quite so much! Mrs W kindly advising

* Beautiful surprise for last nite in town.  Simpsons on the Strand. Mr. W says making certain I have good English beef inside to see me off

* Longest train ride. All trying so not to cry. Silly jokes & gossip. Such love for these friends. Foolish 2 hope Des may visit NY for Mr. G?

* Boarding now. Will have no chance to write til arrive NY.  My heart leaps at sight of boat. The future - how beautiful!  Titanic! Adeline

Introducing your narrator for September.

Adeline Thorne is the daughter of a recently-deceased scholar whose pension and subsidized residence have expired with him, leaving her with only a tiny inheritance. Required to make her own way in life, she accepts the offer of a cousin to work at a women’s college in New York. She must reluctantly end her studies at St. Hilda’s College, Oxford and take her leave of friends and everything familiar. Despite her sadness, she is excited by the adventure and the future is starting to look bright as she heads for America…on the Titanic.

CROATOAN

As promised, here are the collected tweets of Margret Mylton of Roanoke.  To see what I have to say about month 2 of the Extreme Writing experience, visit Light Up the Cave

tomorrow.  And don’t forget to check back here tomorrow to meet your narrator for the month of September! 

*It gets no easier to keep the Sabbath.  My Spirit yearns but there is 2  much needs doing. Will this Rough Land ever b home?

*Minded young Virginia.  It pains me 2 think my own Danyel wld have been Walking by now.  I worry for the one I carry.  I must b Strong

* Walked on the Sand. Sea so lovely! Sandpipers :)  Laughed and cried.  Am so foolish when I’m gravid – happysadhappysad! 

*Good thing about Drowt? --Wot Herbs did survive it have dried well. In this if nothing else r stores will suffice.

*Properly roasted over coals, Snake tastes more like Chyken than like Eel.  Can this b dried as Croatoans do Meat? 

*W. Sole is indeed courting Roanoke Maid.  Neither village happy.  Sole warned 2 b Cautious.  We may have 2 leave sooner than planned

*Thot I lost my best Needyl! Praise, twas stuck in my good Cap.  Good cap getting less so.  Soon we may have to leave off Caps.    

*After prayers, read in my commonplace Book.  Surprised how much I have learned and writ about Herb Lore these 2 years. 

*Weary of crab and Fyshe. Know I shld b Grateful but yearn so for Meat.  Dreamed last nite of venison.

*Next deerskin -- if ever -- Joan & I will try 2 make some Mocka-san boots as they do.  R boots are nought but Patch

* Manteo brought herb woman 2c Samuel.  Poultice new 2 me. Must learn 2 speak their language. I say Magwitch repeatedly; think this is thnx

*Geese in Flyte. Tom & Sole browt some Down w theyr Bows.  Manteo much impressed. Now this land 2 will speak of the skill of English Archers!

*Dare 2 rtn with Manteo & be our Scout.  He takes with him all our questions & Prayers.  Ellenor shews her Sire’s dignity & Blinks not.

*Rain @ last!  2 layt for Growing & not much. Enuf 2 refresh.  Stood with Elinor & Agnes behind woodpile in r shifts with Hair down.  Ahh!!

*Samuel is failing. Special prayers for him @ Service, but fear tis God’s Will he leave us. We have Lost so many.

*Samuel has Passed.  He will be much mourned. My Thomas looks so thin & worn. I reach for him often & Fear to find him Gone.

*Used the last of the Weet Flowr 4 a rising.  The starter I have from my Mother's Hearth.  My heart breaks. I must find a Way to keep it live.

*So much rendered Goose Grease 2 store but where? Finally a use 4 chamber Pot Gov Whyte left behind with Ellenor!

* Elennor 2 is again w child. We wept 2gether & swore 2 b Mothers & Sisters to 1 another.  What would I b without her & Joan & Agnes?

* I wld lief bury my Commonplace Book 4 them 2 find. Thom says foolish; where we r going,  I will need what Wisdom it contains

* children must learn their Letters.  Idea! will make chapbooks from Byrch. Ash & Grease, 4 ink we have in surfeit! good project 4 Winter

* After Prayers, Thom & I walked on the Sand & unburdened our Hearts. There is a Blessed Peas from this, & Lyteness

* We cannot have enuff Baskets!  We Weeve endlessly, fingers Chapt & Bleeding. Agnes most resorsfull but still we wurry we have 2 few Reeds. 

* Not kynd to Laff @ those boys, but so funny to see Feathers everywhere!  Next time, they’ll know to ask the Women to do it!

* Dare rtnd, Praise Him. So much 2 tell. Agnes most excited – there will be Clay 4 her. Am pleased 4 her gladness; she has suffered so.

* The men are taking down the buildings.  Must save all Nayles & hinges.  All ironwerk more Precious to us now than Gold.

* Just as it took Root, our small bit of England must be Dug Up again!  We women will not leave our Rosemary & Lavender & brier Rose.

*Sole has gone.  What he did not Take was left on his pallet with a Note saying Godspeed.  Godspeed to him & his Crenepo, if 2 her he went.

*Our last Sabbath on this Spot.  We shall build a Tabernacle in the Wilderness.  Yet again.  Praise Him keep us.

* 2nite we Feast on all we will not Carry.  We wear what Best we have, & sing & Dance in joyful Festival.  We must meet the future with Joy

*Can w8 no longer. Thomas is carving a message in the tree 4 Govnr White.  Croatoan. He will understand. Yrs Margret Mylton

Introducing Your Narrator for August!

Despite their joint lack of prospects, Margret, the middle of seven children and one of three daughters of a Clapham farrier, had married Thomas, a London bricklayer and tiler, recently articled.  The Myltons had been married little more than a year when Thom was enticed by the adventure proposed by a fellow bricklayer working at St. Bride's Church.  In 1587, the Mytons left London with Ananias Dare and his wife Eleanor, to forge a new life in the New World, in a place called (after its native inhabitants) Roanoake.

The Full Blast from Pompeii

As promised, here are the collected tweets of Vibiana of Pompeii.  For some writerly impressions of first month of Extreme Writing, visit me @ Light Up the Cave

And don’t forget to check back here tomorrow to meet your narrator for the month of August! 

* Got new sandals @ the forum.  Exquisitus maior! Greek, of course. They always make the best.  $$$, but Caius says I have pretty feet : )

* Poor Arva.  Another marriage negotiation come to 0.  She sez she’d rather join the vestals.  Her pater sez not with his fortune she’s not

* The earrings Rufus gave Nicia -- sooo bellus!  Silver lilies with pearl.  Wonder if Caius will ever give me jewels.  Sigh.

* Walking by the Lupanare. Iulia stared @ the girls in coin girdles. Child thought they were princesses. LOL!  Sandals pinch, but still bellus

* The Oracle is spouting direness.  Nicia says nobody listens 2 oracles any more.  Banquet 2morrow @ Celia's

* Never NEVER hire those Frankish acrobats 4 yr banquet.  Total disaster!  I thot Celia wld die!

* Scandal! Rufus gave Daria the same earrings as Nicia!  Guess he thot they still weren’t speaking.  They r n’t now!  

* Still on the waiting list @ bibliotheca 4 that scroll of Silo the Younger.  Arva says it’s trash.  I can only hope, LOL!

* Went 2 gather wax for thread.  Bees are gone.  Weird. Logas says it’s a bad omen.  I say that’s slave superstition.  Thots, any1?

*  Nicia’s dropping Rufus 4 Zeno.  He may b old & lame, but has $$$ and wld never give 2 woman the same jewel. He has sweet smile.

*  Saw Caius & his Pater @ the forum looking v serious.  Talking about me?? Ye gods! I’m going 2 fast 2nite & make an offering @ dawn 

* No sleep last night. Caius outside temple - had 2 hide so he wldn't c me w circles under eyes. So much hope offering was pleasing.

*  Banquet @ the Satria.  Rufus with Daria. Nicia so drunk, she tried 2 dance w that bronze faun that stands by the impluvium.  Zeno not : )

*  Nicia's cousin Marius sez Caius' Pater doesn't think my familia is high enough 4 him.  How mean is that?!  I h8 Marius

* the Cassii are visiting from Rome. 1st time since Sextus died. So much sadness for that familia. There will be many banquets now :)

* I wanted 2 make an egg dish 4 cena 2day, but there were hardly any. The slaves says the hens have almost stopped laying. Very strange

* Many banquets indeed! Every1 is after new tunics. Eumachian stalls look like a sardine run. Pater must allow me or what will Caius think?

*  Ye gods! What is Pater thinking? ! don't care who his people r! Varus is a baby and his skin is like bad fish.  O Caius, save me!

* Arva’s reading Naturalis Historia – & liking it! No wonder her Pater is tearing his hair out.  She’ll never find a husband that way.

* Saw that new wrestler over @ the palaestra. Fervens maxiumus! Nicia practically drooling.  Thot  Zeno wld have a fit – then where wld she b?

*  The Vulcanalia games will b the best ever!  The Satria have asked me 2 sit in their box. Now Pater must let me have a new tunic!

*  Fresco @ villa of Julia Felix w a satyr that looks exactly like Rufus – swear 2 the gods!  U totally have 2 c this!  

*  Doleo!  Caius' pater has contracted him 2 Tertia of the Cencii.  That's why they came 2 town.  I hate the Cencii!  Caius 2! I want 2 die!!!

* Plume of smoke from the mtn. Not only Iulia sez so.  C if I care! What good wld the Cencii do Caius then? Mater sez don't b stupid

* Tertia of the Cencii is only 12 & flat as a boy. Arva sez since Sextus died last yr, dowry is plurimus maximus. O greedy Caius, U slay me!

* Dark circles from crying.  Mater sez if I appear in Satria box like this I'll never find husband. She told Pater I must have new tunic.

* More smoke. Mater worried. They're sacrificing 5 white calves @ Temple of Jupiter. Pater says that shld do the trick, esp w games so soon

*  Games will b torture!  Marius sez Caius is making public appearance with Cencii. Their box next 2 Satria. I will take poison & die b4 I go!

* Thx Mater 4 new tunic. Exquisitus maior! No1 wld ever take me 4 a boy - even Nicia wishes she had my shape. Caius will b sooo sorry!

* Games mirabilis!  Turns out I was invited 4 Satria cousin who looks like Apollo.  Talked 2 me the whole time. Caius burning. Who cares?!

* Something has happened. Sky is black with. Feel heat.  Must run NOW.  F U read this, pray 4 us!

Introducing your narrator for July!

Vibiana, the author of July’s Tweets-from-history, lives in a charming spot on the Mediterranean.  Like most of her friends, she spends her days helping with the numerous tasks at home, including keeping a watchful eye on her younger sister, Iulia.  Vibiana loves parties, shopping and the adorable Caius, who she dreams of marrying.  She’s a typical young woman of her time and place, the time being 79 AD and the place, a little town called Pompeii.

For more Worlds of Wordcraft, visit me during the month @ Light Up the Cave

New Blovel Project Starting July 1

Yes, you read that right!   My next adventure in post-digital fiction will make its debut on July 1.  The new project, like the last one, will run through Twitter.

I read three main categories of tweets.  There are tweets from companies (or people who are companies), which are out there for marketing, keeping a profile high and maybe occasionally giving some useful information.  There are rollouts, usually intense bombardments over a narrow period of time, to get the word out about an event/disaster/cause.

And then there are the brain farts.  Sorry, but I've mulled this over for hours and there's simply no more elegant way to describe them.  This is what most of us do -- blurt out whatever is in our heads at the moment.  Off to the mall; fingers crossed they have the jeans!  Why do cafeteria's always smell like tuna and oranges?  Fat sweaty guys should have to wear shirts on the subway.  How can the beach be closed on the hottest day of summer??

Those kinds of things.

SO, figuring that while times change, people really don't, I started wondering about what people might have tweeted once upon another time.  For the new project, I'll be picking a different time and place each month, and putting myself in the head of someone who might have lived then/there.  Not rulers or genius or people who otherwise wandered into recorded history. Just ordinary people.  Like me.  Like us. And every day of that month, in the voice of that person, I'll be issuing one tweet.  Together, each month's tweets will have a story arc.  I'm committing to a series of three sets, to run over July, August and September.

Readers can follow me on Twitter (@loriberhon) and read the tweets as they're posted.  Alternatively, they can be read altogether, at month's end when the month's entire set of tweets will be gathered into a single post right here on the Blovel blog site.

The next post on this website will introduce your Guest Tweeter for the month of July.

be seeing you!